Notes from a Big Happening

Right now I’m sitting by a roaring fire in a wooden chair that Gandalf would sell his beard for, writing this as it gets darker and darker outside. On Sunday night we finally made it to Chotilsko at nine in the evening. After getting a bus from Prague to the worrisomely derelict looking bus stop in Chotilsko, we were picked up by the biggest camper van-driving longhaired hippie I’ve seen in a good while. About nine people and their backpacks piled into the van, and our tie-dye sporting chauffeur set off into the night. After driving for some time on crooked roads in the middle of the forest, we realize he's lost. All we see is mist in the beams cast by the van’s headlights. We turn around and head back, try a different turn. While neither his navigational prowess or automobile credentials evoke confidence, in my tired state I am rather amused by the realization that the journey is starting to play out like the horror movie I’ve been secretly scared it’ll turn into all along.

So it is to my surprise when after some more seemingly aimless driving in the dark, we arrive at our destination. In the darkness, you can’t really tell where you are. The outline of our hotel is visible against the night sky. Rather than resembling a mental asylum/Dracula’s castle/that house from Scream it looks like a ski chalet similar to the ones you’ll find in the Alps. Promising. The entrance hall is dominated by a big fireplace and wooden seats. The scent of food wafts in the air. People are talking happily. I breathe a sigh of relief. We sit down for a late dinner. In my booking form for this trip I had happily ticked the ‘vegan’ box when it came to food preference, and now found my supper consisting of eggplant laced with garlic, a slice of cucumber and fourteen potatoes (I counted). I head to bed, tired and in a potato coma.

The days are full of activity, from breakfast at eight in the morning to dinner at half past seven in the evening. The program so far has featured climate justice, plans for the Copenhagen climate conference and effective communication and activism strategies. When it comes to climate know-how this is the best of company; great people, good work and inspiring stuff are not lacking at this Big Happening. Neither is food. Lengthy discussions are followed by seminars, workshops and presentations, which are complemented by giant breakfasts, power lunches, cake and fruit breaks, two course dinners and bottomless mugs of tea. Before coming here I was worried the non-meat fare would be scarce. I was wrong, it’s plentiful. The kitchen peeps are keeping it vegan by replacing animal protein with a daily potato quota of 27 root vegetables per person. Fuel for more strategizing. Rock on, tubers.

Derailed and on the road.

I’m writing this on a train. Currently, I’m speeding from Copenhagen towards Hamburg. This morning I was in Stockholm. Last night I was in Turku. This evening I’ll be in Berlin, and tomorrow I’ll be in Prague. From Prague I’ll only be a hop and a skip from my final destination, Chotilsko, 50km south of Prague. Now what is so special about Chotilsko, you may wonder. Well, aside from being the potential setting of a new b-horror movie starring yours truly*, Chotilsko will play host to Friends of the Earth’s annual get together, The Big Happening. So in actual fact, I’ll be far from alone and hopefully equally far from meeting a miserable end at the maw of the wolfman/zombie/other fiend possibly residing in a small Czech village by a dam.

What I will be doing, more importantly, is meeting FOE-folk from all over Europe and strategizing on climate action, talking about Copenhagen, and working towards saving the world. Extracurricular activities might involve beer drinking, for the simple reasons of it being both good and cheap at our destination. I’m really looking forward to all of the above, in equal amounts.

But Chotilsko is still a couple of countries away, and I’m still in transit for a good many hours: Scenery changes, schedule checks, a cacophony of languages, train after train. There’s something great about getting on the rails, though. You can track the gradual changing of the view outside your window, and actually see how Sweden is different to Denmark, for example. You get to do cool things like have breakfast in Stockholm, lunch in Copenhagen and dinner in Hamburg. You have time to get through an entire book in one go. Or listen to all 168 songs currently on your iPod (I’m on 24 right now). The only thing that sucks is the lack of internet. Which is why I’m not sure if I’ll be able to post this tonight. Or if I’ll have this update online tomorrow. Or ever.

If the person reading this found my laptop somewhere with the rest of my dismembered limbs, a word of warning: run from the man with the hairy face.

* My friends seem to think that taking a train to the middle of nowhere and spending the week leading up to Halloween in the remnants of a village destroyed by the building of a huge dam, with no outsiders, no internet and limited phone network coverage, can only result in a gruesome end in which my various body parts are eventually sent home in separate packages, despite fierce garlic-wielding, ninja-chopping, silver bullet-firing attempts to save myself.

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Note from the Author: the above entry was written yesterday, and since finding an internet connection was impossible then, i'm posting it now from our hostel in Berlin. So my apologies for it coming online later than expected, but a cheer of joy to the fact that i'm still in possession of all my limbs. 

On another note, after getting a lucky six hours of sleep last night, we got up incredibly early to make it to breakfast this morning. Turns out clocks were pushed back last night, breakfast isn't served for another hour. Fail.

Eat and be cultured.

Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day, which is why i wholeheartedly endorse its lengthier, more luxurious big brother, brunch. A haggard looking bunch of last night's drunken heroes can easily find a more enticing hangover breakfast than the scraps of that falafel bought at 4 am at one of the growing number of spots in Helsinki that offer weekend brunch buffets. This particular Saturday, the bunch was looking less haggard and more towards the theatre adaptation of The Jungle Book that they were attending after eating, so it was a slight dent to the happy mood when we made our way down Uudenmaankatu to find that Belly, one of the best and most decently priced brunching venues, was closed. Undeterred, we decided to head to Ekberg on Bulevardi, which serves an allegedly scrumptious brunch. Turns out it's pretty pricey, too. At 18 euros per person we turn it down and decide to continue our food forage. Fanny Goes to Hollywood by Koff park has a brilliant brunch (good teas, tapas-like dishes and croissants) but is out of the question as it only opens at 11. We consider Cafe Engel, but it entails a long walk for which we're too hungry and cold. Deciding to find somewhere closer, we walk down Albertinkatu towards Tori, which, to our mounting disappointment, is closed. 

And then, like a strike of genius, someone remembers that Primula serves brunch, which none of us have ever sampled. A stone's throw down the road, we cross our fingers and hope for the best. To our relief, we find the restaurant is open and brunch is served from ten to two in the afternoon, and is priced at a very decent 10 euros. Brunch isn't brunch unless it involves sparkling wine, and at Primula a flute of bubbly will set you back 2 euros, which makes refusing alcohol with your breakfast impossible. 

At 10.30 on Saturday, the restaurant hasn't filled up yet, and the calm is a nice contrast to the buzzing cacophony that fills Belly at brunch time. We station our bags, coats and glasses at a table by the window and head for the food. Breakfast buffets can sometimes be the downfall of a vegetarian, not to mention a vegan; sausages, scrambled eggs and bacon are a staple of hotel breakfasts that seem to make their way into every buffet, everywhere. Breakfast at Primula was no different. What was refreshingly different, though, was the variety and quality of the veggie-friendly food. From olives, marinated zucchini strips and mushrooms to three different kinds of breads (and tapenade!), to potato wedges and little donuts to fresh fruit, this breakfast is a winner in my books. We spent the best part of two hours enjoying it, and in the midst of eating decided we wouldn't tell anyone else we found the best brunch in Helsinki. This is me not telling.


After eating we headed to Kansallisteatteri for Jungle Book. Half a dozen happy free-ticket sporting friends (and one whose suit-wearing habit had resulted in him mistakenly being charged for his) file into the theatre, ready to see some Kipling on stage. 
In this adaptation, the jungle is a dystopian Helsinki, and the animals that inhabit it are portrayed in a way that sharply contradicts the original; Baloo the bear speaks russian and resembles a motorcycle gang member, and the black panther Bagheera is a drag queen with the skinniest, longest legs, highest heels and biggest headpieces. Mowgli, the only human featured, is played by 29-year-old woman, and the monkeys (by far the best and most annoying characters) are something between teen goths and cosplayers with a serious case of ADHD. The plot and message remain the same, and it's interesting to see how the story is updated to reflect contemporary society (like when Shere Khan the tiger yells "i'll kill humans to extinction" at the audience"). Old message, new setting, updated characters. Lots of laughs. And it was free, too. Go see it, and should you be a student in a suit, make sure to tell them it doesn't mean you aren't a kid.

i heart in October.

1. Nick Cave. especially on No More Shall We Part. Possibly the love of my life.
2. Vispipuuro. For those of you who have yet to be acquainted with this delicacy, check out the recipe and get cookin'.
3. Carnivàle. How have i not known about this HBO treasure until now? 
4. Festival reminiscing. Yeah summer's over, but in July at Ruisrock i drove over someone's foot!
5. Breath. Seeing yours when you go outside.
6. Baked potatoes. Cheap, easy, and you can eat them with anything.
7. Club Wanted at Lepakkomies. Rock 'n' roll dancing, neat music, burlesque shows, hell yeah.
8. Tattoos. The design for the next one is finally on paper!
9. Jack Skellington. I like him in other months too. 
10. Crowmoor Dry Pear Cider. Judging by the can, this could be zombie juice. Brraaaainnns...